2013

Jan 16 - Doug Richardson - A rainy dreary January day and went to Doug Richardson's funeral mass.  It was in a large Catholic churched was attended by hundreds; a testament to Doug friendships and involvement.  Former Governor Jim Thompson was one of several who offered words of remembrance.  The event was very emotional and touching, especially because of his young age and the way he died....ALS and only a year and a half from diagnosis to death.  What a cruel disease. And more so than most.

Jan 22 - New York - NMSS - I got very little sleep to come up for a job interview with them. It's a bone chilling day walking through New York and faced with a panel of staff and volunteers.  Somewhat intimidating....but I actually think I did alright.  But, of course, I'm second guessing myself.  Now with the adrenaline gone, I'm filled with anxiety.  Certainly I want to be accepted and valued and "win", but more importantly if I don't get this job, I know I'll be incredibly depressed.  It's my best job prospect to date and if I don't get it I'm back to square one.  Morally, it helps to have finished a book, as I just did - the Timekeeper, by Mitch Albom - that reminds me of what's really important in life; that these things involving jobs, etc. are really transitory.  So at the very least I can recommit myself to my Advocacy Partners and keep looking for something else.

The Months - Here's hoping that 2013 is a lot better than 2012. Aside from the LLS massacre, family problems have cropped up again. I spent the better part of December in Chicago - over two driving trips - sorting through some problems with my aunt. She has been like my mother since I was about fourteen (which is another story), giving me opportunities and support that otherwise may have left me in worse shape.

My brother Jack reported that after several falls she'd developed dementia and after a rough episode had to be taken to the hospital. From there she was admitted to Lexington, a long-term care nursing facility, where she was given a room on the top floor with all the Alzheimer's patients.

It was a shock to see her the first time. Only 72 buts looks 100. Frail and stooped, she was delusional; hallucinating and confused. It's especially depressing because you can't really have a conversation with her. She may think I'm someone else and lives in other worlds, as though her brain is firing off from memories or fantasies in arbitrary ways -- but not the here and now.

So visiting her is a futile affair. She's slowly deteriorating, but in many ways it's like she's already dead. And that finality was driven home as I sorted through the house and her affairs. On the first trip I interviewed three real estate agents to put the house on the market, rented a dumpster to start throwing the accumulation of junk in the house, interviewed an estate sale firm, had the two cats put to sleep (very depressing, brought clothes to good will and spent hours sorting through financial papers and cleaning out closets and drawers.

It was a physical and financial mess. I ended up spending about 10 days there on the first trip,but needed to get back for a job interview...which turned out to be a waste.

The second trip, between the holidays, was primarily focused on getting my aunt's car for Christopher. During the first visit, my brother Jack - a very handy guy - installed new front brakes, changed spark plugs, the oil and other fluids. This second drive included Chris and two of his friends, Ellis and Alex, and we drove straight through to Lake Zurich in about 13 hours. That was a Thursday. The car still had several needs and on Friday morning I was determined to knock off as many as possible. And it turned out to be a day of productivity for the record books. First, I dropped it off at an interior detail shop (it stank and was filthy!), then drove to Secretary of State's office in Libertyville to get title and registration taken care of, then picked the car up and over lunch called to get insurance coverage. Then went to Best Buy to have a stereo installed - which had to be done at 4:00. So in the meantime we went to Mexico Muffler and Brakes (a real hoot!) which took care of exhaust problems in less than two hours; then back to Best Buy.

The car was legal and pretty good to go, so Chris and his buddies went to visit his cousins in Evanston...and ended up staying there for the next four nights. His aunt Betsy was very patient and when I picked them up on New Year's day brought her some fruit and flowers.

We stayed at the Smiths on the way back and had some other minor repairs done before we hit the road back to VA. Chris now has a car of his own to get to school and help us with transporting his brothers.

I did some other clearing out of my aunt's house and will no doubt be going back at some point; if for a funeral if nothing else. The house is under contract, thank god, which means we'll have to arrange an estate sale pretty soon. Hopefully that will not require my return, but who knows.

The Week and Times - An account of a week; Martha convinced me to go skiing with her on Tuesday. The kids are in school and it's a weekday - and the weather had been cooperating. Liberty was pretty empty and we had a wonderful time just taking our time. Turns out most of the Baltimore crowd was at the Ravens victory parade following their Superbowl win.

The previous week Chris got in an accident which essentially totaled his car. Now we're back to driving him to work and helping him figure out how he gets to class. Fortunately we have Alex living here and he can pick up some of those duties.

Jamie called with some medical problems that he had to have treated and we are concerned because of his cancer history that he be seen at the pediatric cancer as soon as possible. The end of the week saw Patrick's musical theater/drama classes perform at the 'black box' at the high school. They were just individual numbers or skits from musicals or plays. As the only boy in the musical theater class, Patrick was in three numbers and did quite a nice job; especially with Abby; his former partner in Annie.

Developing Storylines - Lots of changes and developments. I start a new job tomorrow and am thrilled to be back in the saddle. It doesn't mitigate the pain of last year, but at least it gives me new focus.

And we've managed to come out with some financial benefits that have allowed us to do a few upgrades around the house; especially a new bed and closet. It's also allowed us to catch up on obligations with Frank and assure the boys of going to Camp Highlands.

Nate finished the season with the Bulldogs (travel basketball team) disappointed. Over the season he sat on the bench more. Most of the starters are taller which would account for some of it, but we believe the coach is more interested in coaching a game than in coaching a team. Winning is paramount. That reality comes with moving up the seniority curve, but Nate may have reached his limit. Fortunately, he's gotten on a lacrosse team (with the help of the Poncins) for the spring, and Martha has signed him up for tennis, which could be a good direction for him.

Patrick has won a leading role in "Urinetown" that Loudoun Valley High School is putting on. He has rehearsals almost every day after school. He was also in some short performances in the "black box" theater and did very well (see videos). Unfortunately, he also severely sprained his ankle skateboarding and has been on crutches the past week. He's also working at Pump It Up on weekends, so his time is pretty booked. Through it all, though, he seems to be maintaining an "A" grade in all his courses. Keeping our fingers crossed.

Chris just took a trip down to Richmond to visit Jamie. He's continuing at NOVA for this semester, working as a counselor at Camp Highlands for the summer, then - hopefully - starting at Radford in August. This is a double keeping our fingers crossed. And like Patrick, he's working at Pump It Up whenever he can get the hours, though mostly weekends.

Jamie has decided on his grand odyssey and is coming up here before he heads out to the west coast with Warren. He's given up his job and his living arrangement and making a big plunge to see what he can find. I'm very proud of him. It's a scary proposition -- but best done at his age (and wish I'd done it myself...though the move to DC was a huge gamble at the time).

After all the struggles we've gone through cleaning out Aunt Carroll's house, getting her set up in the nursing home and selling the house, etc......she's make a remarkable turnaround and much of her memory has returned. Some of it may be due to a drug patch she's been wearing, but some from not drinking, too, we're sure. Jack, Mary and Tom are now taking her out and she can start to catch up with friends. All in all, things are going o.k. for now.

Book - Normally I don't comment on the books to the right -- and normally I'd include them only after I'd finished them. But on "God & Stephen Hawking; Whose Design Is It Anyway" I put it down at about one-third read. His angle is countering the arguments of Stephen Hawking and science in general, that hints at any question of God. So I'd expected some intriguing, thought-provoking arguments. But I was thoroughly disappointed. When I finally got to "God is a person from whom natural law comes" I couldn't take it anymore. Clearly he is too invested in the mythology. Beyond that, his arguments seemed sophomoric and his tone is snide and condescending. Hawking has nothing to worry about. I'm glad I only spent five dollars on the book.

A Year's Transitions - November 3- 2013 - In a nutshell - to catch up. Most of the last few months I've been adjusting to the work regiment; getting up earlier, plodding through the 'to-do' lists and getting used to the people at the office, the people in the community and defining my role.

Much of that has been building an agenda and an advocates network. We recently had great success with a bill that passed both chambers and is now being signed by the President. And we've had great success with state "stock epinephrine" laws. I'm now planning campaigns on restaurant legislation, EMS bills and, somewhat hesitantly, on airline rules. My comfort level, confidence and ambition have been taking hold in the last few months and been a welcome transition.

Patrick's performance in Urinetown was remarkable (see videos) and was capped off with a trip to the Kennedy Center for the Cappie Awards -- at which Loudoun Valley scored numerous awards.

Over the summer the boys went off to Camp Highlands - Chris as a counselor and Patrick & Nathan as campers. Chris had an incident as the leader of a trip going down a waterfall in the dark. And Nathan had a miserable expedition in soaking rain. But otherwise they had a gas, as usual.

Martha and I took advantage of the 'kid-free' time to book a trip to Costa Rica at a resort on the Pacific side. Other than a snorkeling excursion and a trip to a local town for some shopping we didn't do much - which was the whole point.

Jamie only pursued his western odyssey as far as San Francisco. Warren came home and Jamie has attempted to set up a life there. It's clearly been a struggle, but Mimi has joined him there and we're immensely proud of his courage and determination -- and his growing maturity.

He just came back for a brief visit a couple weeks ago and we had a nice visit. We're especially encouraged by his commitment to get back to school when he gets settled. He's now doing seasonal work at UPS which will hopefully turn into something permanent.

Chris is now working at both Pump It Up and at Nick Greer's restoration shop. That keeps him relatively busy - though we are now having to help him manage his money. Since the incident with my aunt's car, he needs to save up enough to get another to relieve us -- especially Martha -- from having to juggle his needs with our schedules.

Patrick latest drama production is The Crane Wife - a Japanese folk tale in which he plays the lead again. It's a one act - 45 minute play with a very interesting story. (see rehearsal video) Last weekend he spent in Reston at a competition and the LVHS drama team took fifth in a field of 40 with this play. Not bad. He's continuing 'zero period' at 7:30 to accommodate jazz band and musical theater, taking piano lessons in Winchester at Shenandoah Music Conservatory, working at Pump It Up on the weekends and skateboarding whenever he can. On that last item; he's damaged his ankles so much, he's now going to physical therapy.

While Patrick was away on this Reston weekend, Martha and I stole away to an inn in West Virginia. It was a little odd in that it was close quarters - but novel. And it gave us a chance to go on a beautiful hike to a mountaintop.

Slowly we're also redoing our family room. We've had the fireplace redone with stone (Canaan Valley!) and bought some new furniture -- though making decisions on it is a grind.

In the process of this updating, most of our older stuff has moved to the basement, where the kids now have a tv/couch hangout pit. And I've moved the drums around, set up a desk with computer near Nate's kit, along with drum mikes so he has a great recording setup!

In late August I went back to Chicago for the 8th annual Neighborhood Picnic. I finally bought myself an acoustic kit (DWs no less!) - purchasing it through Dan at the Drum Pad - so I was able to pick them up at his house and play them for the Picnic. I'd practiced enough that I acquitted myself adequately -- though I still screwed up plenty. (see videos).

My aunt has managed to get out of Lexington and into her own apartment in Lake Zurich. We helped her a little financially and Mary and Jack are giving her a hand where they can. She's looking to have an operation on her eye and eventually drive again -- but the real test will be whether she's able to discipline herself and avoid some bad habits.

Trying to Keep Up - The year is already flying by. Jamie had been out for Christmas and the New Year. He's now taking some classes in Oakland and finding an academic/career path for himself.

With Martha's help, Christopher landed an apprenticeship with a HVAC company and he's doing marvelously well at it. He gets up early every morning and is out the door by six thirty. If he keeps it up he'll rise in the ranks, make some very respectable bucks and have a solid road ahead of him.

It was because of this new job that we had to leave Chris behind when Martha, Patrick, Nate and I went to Park City, Utah at the end of February. It was our first trip west to ski and despite the warmer than usual weather, we had a wonderful time.

Patrick has already been the lead in a school play - The Crane Wife - as a lead character. He's also done his first Shakespeare; A Midsummer Night's Dream - and is now in the high school musical, Legally Blonde. He just did an interesting p.r. stunt at Dulles Town Center to publicize the play. He continues to advance on the piano and has now gone through two more teachers trying to find the right direction.

Nathan went through a season of basketball - house league - and they won the 'championship' though it was colored by a ball hogging player who was the coach's son. He's since started ice hockey where he's struggling. He's never done it before. It's cost us some big bucks, so he better stick with it. He's also doing lacrosse and is part of a team with all his buddies. He's also been invited by his music teacher to become part of The Immortals - the premier band in the school. He's torn because it would take a lot of time and compromise his sports. It's his decision, but we've been trying to point out that in high school his sports opportunities will be more limited.

So maybe becoming a better drummer is something he can aspire to.

Marth is now in Florida with her mom and the boys and I are being decadent for a few days.

Monocle Reunion - Time flies -- for good and ill. A few months ago I got together with the 'ol Dixon crowd at our traditional watering-hole, the Monocle. They included Charlie Smith, Wade Nelson, Katie Lamb-Heinz, Maria Petaros and Paul Stilp. A warm, but restrained evening. We're not as wild as we used to be.

Legally Blonde - Early last month Loudoun Valley staged Legally Blonde, with Patrick playing Warner, the jerk boyfriend. It was a wonderful production and helped solidify Patrick's commitment to drama.

About the Books - I just added some 'recent reads' in my gallery, though they're not all I've read recently. Usually I try to stick to a regiment of one 'serious' book - history, biography, social commentary, etc., followed by a fun, fiction book. Sort of like having a meal and dessert. Since most of my books are from the Loudoun Library and checked out on my iPad, they have a 14 day limit. Some of the serious books can be such a slog that I don't get through them that quickly. In which case, I don't highlight them. On the other hand, I whip through some fiction books so quickly and voraciously that I don't list them either. In particular, I've become a huge fan of Lee Child's Jack Reacher series and read almost every one. But it would be an embarrassment of gluttony to admit that.